Destructive Construction

The holidays back home always seem to refresh and renew my spirits and the recent 5-day trip did just that. In fact, this time has been the most relaxed thus far and it did reinforce that some of the best moments aren't those spectacular drunken misadventures, or big dramatic events, but simply the small moments like three guys on the coach to visit their friend in another city. Indeed, the one line that really spoke out was "destructive construction", a term one good friend used to describe capitalism and how, every day, billions of dollars are wiped off the stock-market and restored the next day. The phrase also conjures images of a phoenix, the ideal of which has always struck me as simply beautiful. To rise up from the ashes as a fiery, wrath-filled creature and to know that even if everything has gone to hell, there is still hope and you can still stand up - face each day as a stronger and more determined fighter.


Of course other ideas are brought to mind with the phrase including the classic abusive relationship example as depicted in such songs like "Love The Way You Lie" by Eminem and Rihanna. A relationship that is both mutually awarding as it is abusive conjures up other phrases like "hate that i love you" or "love that i hate you". In any case, this seems not too dissimilar to a friendship i have. It seems that on a weekly basis we fight but then proceed to become the best of friends the next second. Sometimes it gets so aggravating and all i want to do is escape, to get away from it all but then life seems more empty, and the days a bit colder. Indeed the craziness that drives one away might be the thing that keeps you coming back for more. Don't get me wrong, it's purely platonic but it does conjure up those ideas about annoying habits, such as snoring, that one hates while with a partner who snores, but then can't get to sleep at night once it's gone.

Another image would have to be the triumph one obtains when they are down and out, and everyone bets against them, just so that person can rise up and show up everyone who didn't believe, or think it was possible, to come back. In the academic world, this seems to happen on a regular basis, particularly to me. Every year it seems like all the assessments along the way pretty much go to complete utter garbage grades, and every year this drives me to try even harder and i always seem to survive. This time seems different, my grades along the way have been half decent and the drive is not there. The subjects are the hardest in my life and yet i still have not begun preparing for the disaster that awaits in less than a month's time - will i still make it out alive this time?

These are some of the images that drive me to become a better person because every problem and adversity you face now, if it doesn't kill you, it will only make you stronger. At the end of the day, when everything's been done and dusted, the only thing left is you. That thing staring back from the mirror can be as brilliant as you want it to be and that is the sole reason you should commit to things, not just for lousy grades or public gratification but so you can say that you're a better person for it, and you did the best you can. So pre-examination anxiety, please comfortably annoy someone else because i won't give up fighting, and nor should you.

Building an inspirational mix so bye.