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HOW TO GET BASHED: quotes from the infamous mr cheng

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if you have any interesting quotes from mr cheng, do not hesitate to email me.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Movember Resolutions

So its that time again when all pedophiles get even harder to spot since everyone is spotting a seedy moustache look. Considering I was of asian descent, trying to spawn a moustache was as hard as it was socially awkward to discuss why everyone else’s was a canopy and yours, merely strangely pubic looking.

It was also time for me to make a summer resolution, one of those Jenny Craig moments where all that mattered was looking good in that summer mankini. So I’ve committed to jogging every other morning in efforts to obtain a six pack that isn’t as airbrushed as the ones in the movie 300. It of course includes an ab-work routine that would make Arnold Schwarzenegger (had to look this one up) cringe if Arny boy was an overweight ab-less monster like myself.

My step dad has also recently decided to go on one of those crazy lose a billion kilos by drinking your own urine diets on Today Tonight. Of course, he luckily decided to follow one involving soups other than self-excrement. Overweight being a dramatic understatement, this added family support definitely gives more incentive to not fail like I usually do. Of course, out of support I’ve agreed to drink his three kilojule per tonne diet but only for dinner.

Trying to wake up tomorrow morning so bye.
P.S. Support Movember - it’s all a good cause at the end of the day!

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